As I sit there, surrounded by true believers for the first time in my life, well true believers of Jesus Christ, our Lord our Savior, I was contemplating on the system of control. Trying to figure out the design, the master plan behind this faith, that created an enslaving system, with no loopholes, for people of more intelligence, but mostly of less, to accept into their lives. This dude, Jesus, has saved them, he saved them all. Bullshit. Even if Jesus did walk among us, there is a design to this insanity, modified and made relevant throughout the years so that 2000 years later, john who is kneeling next to me while prayer time is going on, to be controlled. It is my job during this seminar to come to a greater understanding of this.
To tell you the truth, this is not an easy task, because I am so unfamiliar with the theology of Christianity, that I need to constantly gather basic information to decipher the system. “So, how is it again that Jesus atones for our sins?” I ask for the fourth time at least in the last two days. I still don’t get it, fo real. I look at the notes I took throughout the day (I was a good student today) and try to decipher my own words this time that I scribbled on random pieces of paper: “Jesus has taken upon himself all of our sins, and so to be grateful for that we will desire to be more Christ like ourselves.” I inspect another one of those scribbles only to find my eternal question printed on the piece of paper we got from the dude giving the lecture (priest, minister, I’m not really sure what the title is) “Are you saying we can sin all we want since Christ has paid for it all?” he answered my unasked question saying that we can sin all we want, and Jesus will pay for it, but by accepting Jesus into our lives, we won’t want to sin. I sit and think to myself once again in a moment of silence and try to recollect my thoughts. Following theology is kinda rough, so bare with me if you feel like it, but I’m not sure It’ll be coherent…
A recipe for a good religion, based on my moments of silence:
Take 1 prism through which you can acknowledge and measure reality. (we have been separated from the eternal God by sin and can never return to his presence because we are fallen)
Mix with at least 1 counterintuitive narrative, that is only mildly different from your already existing narrative, but essentially different based on the earlier prism. (we are guilty of our sins, but can find redemption through Christ our savior + by accepting Christ our desires change)
Plant at least 2 new ideas in the mind, destructing the old narrative, combined with at least as many ideas from the old narrative (it doesn’t matter what you do, what your actions are, you are measured by your thoughts + it is your relationship with God that matters, Lust and murder are judged the same as sin)
Stir (bring examples from “real life” in which acceptance of Christ can save you, bring scenes from modern movies with characters people can easily relate to and refer them to God – Gandalph as a Christ figure in LOTR)
Wait until the ideas become recognizable in life as known by subject
A new believer is born, or born again.
Essentially, by creating and endless cycle, a perfect loop in which man recognizes himself in, you can create a system, a social order in which people will put their faith in. Christianity, is different in essence because it creates a system in which you cannot be measured externally, therefore what you do in your life is irrelevant, but still reinforces the social structure. As I understand it, the loop works something like this: you are measured by your thoughts not your actions. You are the only one in control of your thoughts. The system questions your motivations thus questioning your own thoughts. You allow doubt into your mind about what is really true in yourself, a doubt that wouldn’t necessarily exist if you weren’t “born a sinner”. The doubts grow in your mind as you seek for approval. There is no room for social approval because it’s between you and God only. You willingly choose to give up your control over your life, and allow a higher power, aka Jesus, to take over for you. You sin again, and you go through the same process. Over and over and over and over. Jesus can save you by creating a reassuring loop, that you know where you will always go back to, because we have no control over our lives, and we are sinners. I kept thinking to myself, “wow, that sucks. Don’t you guys want control over your lives”. I think the hardest thing for me to grasp is that they essentially do take control over their lives, but only in the spiritual sense do they give up control. It has no implications on their daily choices, it exists only in the meta narrative of their eternal lives, but not in how they treat their wives. I think that that is the main appeal. Not the “sin as much as you want and be more Christ like in your thoughts”, but the fact that it is not required to surface in their daily choices, and “interfere” with their lives. It just makes it easy when it’s time to vote in the elections. It’s an impractical philosophy, that coexists with materialism and democracy perfectly – a separation of matter and mind. You can theologically debate about whether Christ is God like, and embodiment of God, or God himself, as long as you purchase your “I love Jesus” t-shirt at Walmart, and excel as a consumer by buying the cheapest product.
It started to become boring even to me, and I was enjoying myself all day, so this probably really sucks as far as reading this post goes. Well I had to give it a shot.
Maybe tomorrow I’ll be able to go back to my recent attempt to be a secretive Gonzo reporter, but for me I had to understand the theology of it all through writing.